An outcome you didn’t want doesn’t make it a bad decision…
Compassion contains wisdom.
Self-compassion means you apply this wisdom to yourself.
In a caring way.
Being self-compassionate means you recognise:
- You didn’t choose this situation
- You didn’t choose to be you
- You didn’t choose to have the mind you have — it has been shaped by others, culture and society
However, you are taking responsibility and learning and growing.
Often, things don’t turn out the way you want them to.
This does not make it a bad decision in the first place.
The wisdom piece is also knowing when you made the choice, it was the only one available to you.
It is easy to look back and say…I should have…
But no…
You did not have another choice.
To think you did means you are ignoring circumstances out of your control or awareness.
At the time, you made your best call.
If it were someone else, what would you say to them?
Dropping judgement is a practice and one that brings great relief and freedom.
It can even relieve your pain.
How?
Anything that ease pressure, inner angst, tension, stress, will change your experience, including pain.
Pain is an experience emergent from a number of body systems working together, which are shaping all your experiences.
Outcomes and results — you don’t have control over these.
The steps you take, you do.
Process over prize.
You concentrate on following the process, and you will obtain a prize.
You don’t know what that will look like because it is in the future and no-one knows the future.
A football team cannot decide the result of a game at the start.
However, that team can focus on playing their best game.
There will be a result and there will be an opportunity for learning.
Some things will seem to go to plan and others won’t.
Both are opportunities for learning.
Whatever happens, you did your best.
See you on Monday.
r.s.